I SMILE AGAIN
I`m Melanija and I`m from Novi Sad. I grew up in a seemingly normal family. My parents travelled a lot and I mostly remember those days spent in hotel rooms and by terrible loneliness. The only joyful and happy days were when I was at my grandparent`s. Then I felt love, attention, and tenderness which, unfortunately, I never felt at home. My mother was very strict, and my father was always absent because of his work.
At the end of elementary school, I started hanging out with rebels from school. I started smoking marihuana and drinking alcohol. I avoided classes and trainings. At home, the situation was becoming worse: arguments, fleeing from home. My parents divorced, and I soon found out that my father was a heroin addict. At the age of 22, I became a single parent, without home or any help from anyone. My life was full of tragedy that I was trying to bear. I felt immense grief, fierce and agony. Countless times I tried to get clean. I was at psychiatric clinic two times, but nothing helped. I lost any connection with reality. After seven years of drug abuse I reached the bottom, desperate enough to think about suicide. It was when I went to Crossroads.
At the beginning, everything seemed unreal. Enormous amount of love, attention and effort that the staff gave me on a daily basis was healing my wounds. In the program, with the help of staff I learned how to love and accept myself and others. Facing the past, changing character, attitudes and habits hurt. The day I met Lord and His great mercy and love I knew it was the way to go and that I won`t give up. Even though there were hard moments, I knew it was the right decision in my life. I started smiling again. I finished the program, free and contended. I`m happy and I know I don`t need heroin any more. Now I have the courage to fight for life.