THE FREEDOM I SEARCHED FOR
I`m Miloš Dašić and I`m from Niš. I`m 30 years old. I was born as an only child of parents who divorced before I was born. I was growing up with my mother and I would meet my father once a year. My mother tried hard to fill my childhood with happiness so I wouldn`t feel my father`s absence. Due to the situation in the country, poverty and war, my mother lost her job. She went to Switzerland, and I stayed with my grandmother. It was the first time I felt the lack of support and motherly love which pushed me through life. Since then, I started feeling some emptiness inside my chest. I left my high school and left to Switzerland to my mother. As she was working all the time I was left to myself. There I met a company and they offered me an easy way to make money.
I started selling drugs and very soon I became an addict. I got arrested and banished from the country. Again I was in Niš, without mother, school, and money. That feeling of emptiness was still there. I continued selling and using drugs. At one drug deal, I met a girl. We started dating and soon we got a son, Uroš. I wasn`t capable of making a living for myself, let alone the others. We often encountered crisis and everything else that comes with drugs. I couldn`t stand crying, sadness, desperation and the everyday arguing which led to our child`s neglecting.
My mother offered me help. She and my grandmother would take care of Uroš, and my wife and I would enter Crossroads. I entered it but my wife rejected to do so. Court brought decision for Uroš to stay with her. I stayed in the program two years. At the beginning it was interesting, I acted foolishly and I often wanted to go home. Bible, prayer and Bible classes were the only things I didn`t make fun of, and they influenced my decision to move on. During weekends I would meet my son surrounded by addicts. It motivated me to succeed, to become free and responsible. Pressures were becoming stronger and stronger, and Bible brought me the only comfort during that time. When I was reading it, the images of future and hope would direct me forward. Today, after two years, I acquired the possibility to go back to Switzerland, where a job is waiting for me. I plan to become a member of a local church. I pray and try to get my son back and send my ex-wife to rehabilitation. I believe that God has plans for my home and that this is only the beginning. Today, I don`t have that feeling of emptiness inside of me. With His presence, God filled me forever and because of that never again will I use drugs. That feeling consists of fatherhood, care, responsibility and challenge. And this is the freedom I searched for.